Amanda Takes Off...

When I got to class tonight, TempMaster said, "Amanda, today testing, OK?" I said, "OK." After all, I certainly wasn't testing since a) he never told me and b) more importantly, I'm not his student.

All the black belts came up first. They did some punching, some combination kicks, and a couple forms. They had to do 50 push ups and 40 sit ups. Then they did some back bridges, plain, then one-legged. Ace farted in the middle of raising his left leg and even TempMaster started laughing. Poor kid got teased for the rest of the night for that.

I was listening carefully during the combo kicks, trying to hear the Korean words for my own test next month. I pretty much understood what they were supposed to do before they started doing it.

Then he called up White Belt, Purple Belt, Brown Belt and me. I looked at him, What?

I was not at all comfortable with the idea of "testing" at this studio since it's not mine, but I couldn't think of any face-saving, kibun-preserving way to say this. Furthermore, I figured any "testing" as his studio was either a) studio etiquette, everyone "tests" but only a few are really testing or b) intended as practice for my test, and c) in any case good for me. So I stood up and went with it.

Meanwhile, while I'd been waiting, my foot had fallen asleep. I tried tapping it against the floor in 주춤서기 stance while we were punching, but it didn't work, which made doing our kicks (plain, no combos) a bit difficult. We did Il, Oh, and Pal Jang. Purple and I were the only ones doing Pal Jang. Brown did Yuk Jang while we were doing Pal and White sat out. I tried to go slowly so she could sort of keep up, but I quickly realized that waiting for her was only going to screw me up and I need to be able to ignore what other people are doing. When I kiyap-ed on the returning kick, HR's eyes turned into saucers. We had been made to restart the form since neither of us kiyap-ed on the first jump (I missed it because I was trying to figure out if we were supposed to be doing the form together) and still I was the only one kiyap-ing.

Then we did the sit ups, push ups, and back bridges. I thought I did well, but I was still the last one done with the sit ups and push ups. Rather than beat myself up, I thought of what Pia once said, "You've got to remember you've got ten years on most of these kids. You're not 17 anymore." Well, yes. My 28 Korean years old self was up there with a 21 year old, a 15 year old, and a 14 year old. When I was 14 Korean age, I did the most sit ups in one minute in my entire gym class, beating not only the girls but all of the boys as well.

Then Master had Purple Belt and me spar. I thought he said no-contact, but I guess he said light-contact since she hit me a few times. While she did well, she didn't have nearly the same spunk she did when we sparred with gear on. I wanted to shake her, "Come on! Kick my butt like you did before!"

We all sat down and TempMaster critiqued HR, Ace, and Purple Belt. After class Sabumnim explained that they were the only three testing. Ah, so I was being used for numbers and as Purple's female counterpart.

It was interesting to see how this studio tested. My own studio is always forms and something else, kicks or sparring or both, or something else random—whatever he decides he wants to test you on. My American studio (past a certain belt) was always poomse, sparring, breaking, three steps, and one-steps. While aspects of taekwondo are the same across the board, so much is dependent on the instructor.

I think it was good for me—to be listening for the Korean, to be told random forms, to get Pal Jang in under a "testing setting" outside of my studio. After all, that's what I'll be doing soon enough.

"Amanda, are you OK? You look down."

I looked at Temp Master. "Really?" I think for a minute. I don't think I'm scowling or anything, but I am fairly quiet. I don't want to explain that every year, February—not April—just seems to go on forever. It's not even February and I'm already feeling like it's dragging on. Instead, I give him a weary smile, "I think I'm just tired."

"Oh," he smiles. He doesn't believe me, but he's not going to push it. Koreans are so good that way. "OK."

We did poomse work. After the first wave of black belts did their forms, TempMaster asked me to work with Purple Belt, to make sure she was using the right blocks and punches. I asked Brown Belt and White Belt if they wanted to join us. We worked on Sa Jang through Pal Jang.

I found it terribly funny to think of how we must look. Four color belts, all in a row. The foreigner, 7 years older than the next oldest one in the group, counting in Korean, telling the white belt the next moves in imperfect Korean, encouraging the easily discouraged Brown Belt to try again. All while the first dan black belts—including two wearing "Instructor Club" uniforms—sit on the floor. And just. Stare.

When I got there, HR caught my eye and bowed to me. I returned the bow. Enough said.

When we did kicking practice with targets, I was paired with Guy Who Doesn't Know I'm a Movie Star. He bowed low to me, used both hands to pass the focus target between us. As a sign of respect, and because I still can't figure out all of the social rules, I almost always use both hands when passing anything to anyone other than my students. Though he is a higher belt, I am his elder, so it makes sense that he is using both hands. Still, I am always surprised when the more formal aspects of Korean culture are applied to me.

(I am also surprised with the -sumnida form is used with me. At the corner store I frequent, the husband uses -sumnida and -yo with me, his wife almost always uses banmal. I loosely know how to make banmal, but understanding it when it's combined with verbs I don't know, vocabulary I don't know, and her high-speed talking, is another matter. I often end up repeating what she's saying, using the -yo form. When they're both there, my mind is working in overdrive.)

Guy was favoring one leg. "다리가 아파요?"

"애?"

"다리가," I touch my leg, "아파요?"

"네, ouchie!"

TempMaster yells for me to move the target higher. I do, but as soon as he turns around, I drop it down a few inches. Guy smiles.

Baking
I tried baking cinnamon rolls this weekend. Something is terribly wrong with the flour here. Or the butter. Or something. I haven't figured out how to keep doughs from being super runny. Doubling and even tripling the amount of flour doesn't work. So I spread the cinnamon filling over the dough, then folded it in half, sprinkled pearl sugar on it (since I don't have confectioner's sugar for icing) and baked it. It turned out like a cinnamon bun cake. It tastes pretty good.

Speaking of "flour..."

Blooms

Although I lost two leaves in my move, I'm getting a single flower on my plant.

Books

I ran to Kyobo this weekend and picked up Bruce Lee's Tao of Jeet Kune Do as well as Once Upon a Time in Korea, an elementary Korean reader. (If you click that link, you can read more about it and download a 23 page PDF sample of the book.)

It's probably still a little too hard for me, but it has 23 stories in it, each one with a list of vocab at the end in the order they appear in the story. (Each word that's listed has a superscript number with it, so it's really easy to look up the words.) The stories are about 3-4 pages long, pretty big print, with pictures. Probably 300-500 words depending on the story and place in the book. The stories are traditional Korean fairy and folk tale written in simplified language.

I'm looking forward to reading it.

Being

As in being a foreigner.

While I was at Kyobo, some random chick, probably a high school student, approached me and asked if she could interview me.

I don't know if it's Koreans or foreigners who are assigning these "walk up to a foreigner and interview them" assignments, but it's just plain awful. It ticks off a lot of foreigners because it makes them feel like monkeys. And it puts a horrible strain on these Koreans, who have to walk up to a total stranger and ask them questions with a notepad and tape recorder. New kids in my studio don't even want to talk to be until they've been introduced by a third party. Koreans just don't meet people like that. Jeez, talk about going against the Korean grain!

(My studiomates would be lucky to get such an assignment. As far as I know, I'm the only foreigner most of these kids have had consistent contact with in a social setting. I'd do interviews for them in a minute.)

So this chick walked up to me and asked me if I was busy. I thought she was going to try to talk to me about God so I said, "Yes." She looked shocked; I saw she had a tape recorder and notebook and I felt awful. It's not her fault her teacher gave her such a bad assignment.

I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you. What?" And suddenly I wasn't busy.

So I did her interview. I am a movie star, you know. Interviews are part of the deal. And meeting new people helps widen my sphere of influence so that I can more easily exercise country peninsular domination one day.

You think I'm kidding...

One of the questions was "what is the biggest problem with Korea?" I wanted to say "teachers assigning thing like this," but considering that the closest Korean word to "sarcasm" is "irony," I decided against it. I could list a whole lot of things wrong with Korea, but I'm a guest here and didn't feel like this poor girl was the one to dump on, so I laughed and said, "bad hogwan bosses!" One of the other questions was "have Koreans ever helped you out?" Boy have they, honey, let me introduce you to Heidi, Master, and my "little brothers..." She asked if I had any hobbies and I said, "Taekwondo." I tried to keep my answers very short and simple, she looked so afraid.

After the interview, she relaxed. I said "Nice to meet you" in Korean and said, "Breathe, breathe. It's OK." Poor girl, she was a nervous wreck. A few minutes later I saw her sitting on the floor, reading some teen English books. I hope that means I was her only/last interview.

What a horrible assignment.

Chinese

As a brief note about Korean, my boss told me where the days come from.

All of the days are a Chinese root + 요일 (day of the week). Written in Hanja they're Chinese root + 曜日.

-Day	Root + 요일	Hanja + 曜日	Meaning
Mon	월	月	moon
Tues	화	火	fire
Wednes	수	水	water
Thurs	목	木	wood
Fri	금	金	gold (metal)
Satur	토	土	earth
Sun	일	日	sun

I find this interesting for a few reasons. First, "Mercury" (the planet) in Korean is "수성" (水星 in Hanja) or "water planet." "Wednesday" in Spanish is "miércoles," after Mercury. Second, I wonder how many languages use the sun and moon for Sunday and Monday, respectively?

And now I'll at least know those Chinese roots to help me learn vocab. Like 수, water, 세수하다 (to wash oneself), 수영[하다] ([to] swim) and 수영장 (swimming pool). (The Hanja for water is also related to taekwondo, but I'll save that for later.)

Circles

Master contacted me this weekend to tell me that class starts again at the normal time on the fifth. WHA HOO! I miss my studio, I miss my boys. Meanwhile, he invited me to something or other through Cyworld. His message was, "윤형이에요 ^^"

Great, "it's a circle/round shape." ^^ Smile! What in the world does that mean?

Blasting

As for taekwondo, thank goodness this is my last week at this studio. We did some poomse work and while the black belts worked on their forms, I worked with Purple Belt again (and Brown Belt joined us for part of it). I found out she's 21. Never, ever would have guessed that.

We practiced Pal Jang facing the room backwards and indeed, it threw us both off. On move 18 we were facing the way we normally do. I was doing the low-cutting block, but my left foot was in front. Purple Belt looked at me and started doing the next move. I shook my head, "No." I was so screwed up that I made us start over. I had to tell her three times which way to turn on move 18. She finally did it (though I don't think she believed me). As soon as we did the following kicks she started nodding, "Oh, oh..."

I am getting better at counting in Korean with long gaps in between.

I like working with Purple Belt, and Brown Belt seems like a nice kid, but I need to get back to my studio. It's time.

Why?

I finally lost it on HR today.

Before doing poomse work, we were doing "fake sports" drills. Jogging across the mats while faking playing tennis, baseball, bowling, etc. When we were bowling, I bowled like Grandpa taught me. I kept using my right hand. Sabumnim said, "왼손!" I smiled and said, "오른손 볼링!" She laughed, but I switched to the left hand. Later we were shooting fake baskets. She caught the look on my face and said, "What?" I said, "I hate basketball," with a laugh. Each time I said something—in Korean or English—HR imitated me in a mean way.

I can take the teasing about my Korean—I mean, I once said my monkey hurt and I told Studious he looked delicious, and I find those things funny—but repeating every English word I said was pointless, especially since he talks constantly. And he wasn't even doing what we were supposed to be doing. He was just standing there, screaming about why he couldn't do anything.

Since he wasn't paying any attention to my frowning looks, I just blasted him. I said, "매일 큰 소리 있어요! 왜?" Everyone started laughing and his jaw dropped, "왜요! 말해요, 이야기해요! 왜?" I scowled and imitated him imitating me, "하지마!"

I didn't even care if my Korean was perfect (it wasn't). I didn't know which "to talk" verb to use, so I used both that I knew. What I was trying to say (and believe was understood) was, "Everyday you have a loud voice! Why? Why! Talking, talking! Why?" I scowled and imitated him imitating me, "Don't do that!" ("Why" is used here the way that we might use "what, huh, how come, repeat that," especially "what?" I even whined my why's the way Koreans do.)

He shut up. Finally.

Long ago, we played ice hockey in taekwondo.

An article (with 5 photos) is up at Glimpse Abroad.

Sabumnim was the only teacher in class tonight, but everything went fairly well. We started by doing these killer leg exercises. We got into modified back bridges. Our chest was pointing to the sky, feet and hands flat on the ground, knees bent, making the knees and shoulders form 90 degree angles. We then lifted one knee slightly and kicked. We did 5 sets of 20 per leg (alternating sides), doing the last set exceedingly slowly. Those are rough; they feel great.

We played soccer. When I got to the circle, it looked like they were going to play 가위바위보, so I said, "가위바위보?" They said to only throw rock or scissors. I was confused. I threw rock and scissors. They nodded I said, "왜?" They started telling me what the English words were. No, no...

I made a rock, and said, "모두?" (Everyone?) They looked confused, so I made a rock with my right hand, scissors with my left hand, and started smashing myself. "바위, 바위, 바위!" They laughed and said, "OK, OK, this" and threw their hands palm-up or palm-down.

I had seen that palm-up vs palm-down thing before but I hadn't understood how it worked. It suddenly clicked.

"Oh! Oh! 편!" They nodded. Teams! We were choosing teams that way. (Call me stupid, but I never did team sports in the States and in gym class we used the "pick captains, they pick players one-by-one" method.) So we threw rock and scissors in stalemates until half of us threw rock and half threw scissors. I must say, I like how randomly teams are chosen here.* I was teamed with Guy Who Doesn't Know I'm a Movie Star, which forced him to acknowledge me.

I went after the ball against a guy who somehow tripped because I was there. I didn't kick him, I didn't block him, I have no idea why he tripped, but he was a good sport about it. Later he hit me in the face with the ball so my (red and black) glasses were all askew on my nose. I laughed, too.

Later I shot my foot out in front of him to get the ball, a good six inches from the mat, and he really did trip over me. We landed face-first on the ground but so gracefully that all of us laughed hard. That was my foul, so he got an extra shot. Thankfully nobody on my team was mad at me, probably because we were laughing so hard about it.

In other news, I made my next set of Sogang flashcards. These were primarily direction words. I knew 23% of the words on the first time through due to taekwondo. Very cool!

* And 가위바위보 is king. I've watched young couples play it at pizza places to decide on toppings. A few days ago I watched four businessmen play it in the streets to decide on a restaurant. In class today we were missing dice, so we played it for a board game (with four students the winner got four spaces, the loser got only 1 space). When I go back to America, everything is going to be "kawi, bawi, bo!"