Amanda Takes Off...

Last week I was told I count my money like a Westerner.

In Korea, money is folded in half and counted facing the counter's chest. Sort of like this. (I took several pictures, but it's still hard to see. However, I don't feel comfortable asking anyone else to count money for photos.) Imagine the money really folded in half and you've got a better idea.

They count money like this in Japan, too. After you count out what they want, you peel off the bills on the outside of the stack. Usually, you hand money to people using two hands, the left hand supporting the right hand, or the left hand under the right armpit, depending on the level of the person you're giving money too. Also, if it's money in the form of a bill or paycheck, you usually give the money in an envelope rather than just handing it to someone.

In the West (or America at least), we tend to hold a stack of bills in the left hand and count them out to the right hand.

And who does that shirt belong to? (It didn't seem this bright in person...) Why, Good Man, of course!

We met today and saw Ocean's 13 together. I haven't seen 11 or 12, but I enjoyed this flick. I know it's unrealistic (you're going to get a Chunnel boring machine—both of them actually—into Las Vegas without anyone noticing?) and over-the-top, but isn't that the point? I thought the ensemble worked well together and I was amused by the subtle humor. The way Clooney and Pitt interacted was great.

At one point one character asks another "Are you in yet?" while the character is trying to hack into a computer. The other answers, "I hate that question." I was the only foreigner in the theater and almost choked. Of course, nobody else got it.

Samsung had some handphone product placement and anytime Samsung was mentioned all of the Koreans in the theater started whispering. "Samsung! Samsung!" Yep. I'm in Korea.

After the movie, I grabbed a few groceries at Kim's Club and Good Man ended up carrying 2 kgs of potatoes around in his backpack for me. "You have potatoes in your backpack!" I'm not sure why this was so funny. Maybe I've been hanging around sixth graders too much.

Also talked about the death penalty, Bush's refusal to respect a subpoena, Michael Fay getting caned, Guantanamo Bay, and Cheney shooting someone in the face.

Somehow these things were all directly related to each other and I got really worked up.

"We have three branches for a reason! Checks and balances! Hello!" "I'm not going home until Bush is out of office at least. Look at him, rewriting the Constitution... 'Ooh, I don't like that part, scritch-scratch..."' "We whine about hitting a kid with a stick and how that's inhumane and yet we execute people?" "I've watched enough crime shows to know that if the police don't immediately investigate someone shot in the face then something weird is going on." "Oh, since it's Cuba—you know that awful country we're not allowed to travel to?—it's not US soil and we can do whatever we want? What sort of logic is that?"

It was nice to talk politics again...

Good Man Laughs At Me

Sixth Grade Boys

After school today, while I was walking to the bus stop, these boys swarmed around me. I adore my sixth graders, these boys especially. They aren't the smart boys, they aren't the eager boys; they're the somewhat difficult but funny and enjoyable to teach boys.

Sixth Grade Boys at Heart

Walking home from the subway station after taekwondo, I came across a group of men. Staring. Though you can't see it in this picture, they were watching a soccer game on TV.

Speaking of games, we started tonight's class sitting in a circle, playing a word game. Someone said a word and you had to start the next word with the last syllable of the previous word. Everyone was very helpful, because I needed the help! I did think of some words on my own. Annoyingly, I thought of lots of words when it wasn't my turn! One of the boys was trying to make a 동 word and I said, "동동주!" (Dongdongju is a fermented rice beer that I really enjoy.) Master burst out laughing and gave me a thumb's up.

I explained that we had a similar game in English that went by using the last letter. Master had us play that for a while. It was nice to get to help everyone else.

Class was fine, it was a test night, a very casual test night since none of us are officially testing soon. When I got there, everyone laughed at me. I was dressed in a black shirt, black skirt and bright red Spiderman socks. "Oooh, Spiderman!"

A nice day...

I went to class tonight. It was a good class. An exhausting class, but good. The more interesting class was Tuesday night, however. That class I spent the whole time asking and answering questions. (I didn't even end up putting my dobok on.) I was asking about a digital camera and finding a taekwondo class for someone I know. I was answering questions about where I'd been.

NewSabumnim

I haven't seen NewSabumnim in weeks. I saw her and she said, "Amanda! Long time no see!"

We switched to Korean. "I know. I'm sorry. I've been busy."

"Yes! Dating!"

I couldn't see Master, but he wife was in the doorway. She giggled and I blushed. "Yes...that's right." Dang Master and his big mouth. Dang me and my big mouth for telling him the truth as to why I haven't been in class...

NewSabumnim went into quiz mode. "What's his name?... Is he taller than you?"

"Yes."

"How old is he?"

"Twenty-seven."

She slapped my shoulder and nodded, "Oooh! One year younger, very good in Korea for the woman to be older."

"What does he do?"

"He just graduated. He's looking for a job."

"Is he cute?"

I blushed harder and nodded, "I think so. And he's very smart."

NewSabumnim broke out laughing and looked at Master's Wife. "I want to know if he's cute and tall, she wants him to be smart."

I changed the topic quickly. New Sabumnim was wearing a cast of some sort. Seems she did something to her hand while practicing self defense, so she won't be teaching class for a while.

Little Brothers

Then I went up to the studio, where there were very few students. The hand thing must be going around because Brave's Brother was in a cast and Ghost's finger was in a sling. Ghost looked at me and said, "Where have you been, Amanda?"

"I have been busy. Tuesday I had a 회식 [coworker outing that often involves liberal amounts of soju]. Thursday I had to meet my old hogwon boss. She's crazy!" Ghost laughed and I continued, "And then I had a date. Friday I was busy."

"And last night?"

"Oh. I had a date."

Brave's Brother and Ghost rapid-fire questioned me. "Is he Korean? What's his name? Does he speak English? Is he handsome? Is he tall? Does he have big eyes?" (What? They wanted to know what his eyes were like—what sort of eyelids he has.)

I answered all of their questions and Brave's Brother said, "Hey! Everyone! Amanda has a boyfriend! And he's Korean!"

I had no way of explaining that there's been no boyfriend talk yet. "He's not my boyfriend."

Ghost grinned and gave me that matter-of-fact look that made him my favorite kid in the studio. He patted my shoulder and nodded. "He will be."

Good Man and I went out tonight. We caught a concert at EBS Space.

EBS is the national education channel—think Korean PBS. EBS Space is made up of a lot of little places to hear live music, see art exhibits, and the like. The concert venue is really small, something like 150 seats. It's intimate, and neat. I was the only foreigner there, no shock.

We saw 뉴에이지 피아니스트 전수연&데이드림 (New Age Pianists Jeon Suyeon and Day Dream). It was really enjoyable, even though I couldn't understand most of their chattering between songs. I also got to hear a Korean instrument, the 해금 (haegeum). It was a string instrument that sounded a bit like a goose! It was beautiful sounding though.

Then we wandered around until we found ice cream. I got my favorite—a My Mother is an Alien cone.

When we went our separate ways on the Green Line, Good Man gave me a sweet peck on the cheek. In the middle of the subway platform! On the Green Line! (Seoulites understand. The Green Line is one of the busiest lines in Seoul at all hours of the day, perhaps even the busiest). I tell you, from my viewpoint, that is damn near scandalous behavior in South Korea. Especially since I'm white.

Let's hear it for non-traditional men and scandal!

Well, weekend trip was canceled. Had a very nice weekend despite that.

Here are the expressions that made my week.

"We're more into exporting [babies]."

"It's an excursion."

"I am very lucky."

"You count your money like a Westerner."

Absurdity

I had to go back to Labor today because my old crazy boss thinks she doesn't owe me money after she got me evicted.

While I was there, I met another woman who's only been working at that school for a month and she's already going to Labor. Why is this woman allowed to keep having a business?

The letter I got said that if I didn't show up, they'd believe her story. Yet she didn't show up. Basically, she is trying to make me crazy by making me show up at meeting after meeting that she can skip.

Sometimes the laws in Korea make no damn sense. Sometimes Korean logic is not like our Earth-based logic, as I joked with my parents when they were here.

Talking

The plus about having to go to Labor (again) is that I was across town near Good Man's house, so we had dinner together.

He put up with my "She's crazy! What is her problem? Why is she lying?" before we moved on to more interesting topics—China, oil, SLR vs digital, being unemployed. ㅋㅋ

On the way home I talked to Master about how I haven't been in class lately. I've always called in absent, but lately I've missed much more than usual and I hate that. Tuesday I had a coworker outing, tonight was a Labor meeting turned dinner date, tomorrow I'm going out of town. I don't think I've been to a Friday night class in a month and not necessarily because my life has been interesting. I said, "Are you mad at me?"

"No, Amanda. You very busy. Amanda..." He paused. "You are a movie star. It's OK!"

Sometimes I love that man.

Tonight's class was really tough. We did nearly an hour of pure kicking practice, regular kicks and combos. It was hot and by the end of class my ponytail was dripping in sweat. Literally dripping.

Master's Daughter was in class. "Amanda, do you have lip gloss?"

"No, do you?"

"No."

"But [Master's Daughter], I need lip gloss." I made kissing faces at her.

"No, Amanda! You always have lip gloss. Where's your lip gloss?"

Meanwhile, Crybaby, Handphone Girl, Master's Daughter and Master's Son and I were all crammed into the changing room together. I don't know whose bright idea that was but Master's Daughter was begging for my lip gloss.

Then, I had worn jeans to class. Well-fitting jeans. Uggggggghhhh. I could barely pull them on after class.

"[Master's Daughter]! I'm changing. Wait!"

She pouted. "I need lip gloss, Amanda, my lips hurt."

I burst out laughing. Damn me, I've gotten the girl addicted.

"관장님, -는 것? Um...'태권도 하는 것 재미 있어요.' 괜찮아요?" Master, gerund form? 'Doing taekwondo is fun.' Is that right?

"Yes. And Amanda! Look!" He points to my ㅈ, ㅐ, and ㅆ. "You write like Korean now! See, you are very Korean."

I burst out laughing. It's true. My stroke order is no longer correct. It's realistic.

"Amanda, yesterday you have date. Where go?"

I burst out laughing again.

Later in class Master barks out commands in English and I answer in Korean. Finally he says, "Amanda! Why I speaking English and you speaking Korean?"

I grin. "몰라요!" I don't know!

TP

Toilet paper tends to be sold one roll at a time or twenty-four rolls at a time in Korea. It is hard to find anything in between.

The former teacher at my school had my apartment. She left me fourteen rolls of toilet paper. Michael is moving and gave me another sixteen rolls today.

I think I could toilet paper my entire "apparteu" building with what I have in the closet...

Soju

I had the longest first date of my life today. I thought of Pia's "Dear Men" post more than once. Nine and a half hours? Unlike Pia's date, however, I didn't have to try and weasel out of it; it was a good time.

Now I can say I've seen Monet's water lilies in real life. And they are beautiful.

I texted Master after the date. I just learned the gerund form (-ing) and wrote in Korean, "I just had a date from 1 until 10:30. Dating in Korea makes me tired."

Master immediately responded in English and responded to all messages in English ("we drank soju" got "ㅋㅋ AHH!!! HE IS GOOD MAN!!!"). I asked if he'd been drinking soju since he was speaking English. "Of course!"

I wrote back "If it's the weekend, you are drinking soju. And lately, me too."

"I know. You good woman!!!"

I was laughing like a maniac on the subway. Ahem.

ROKMARBDE

To top off the evening, the taxi driver I had was a Korean Marine vet (of Blue Dragon fame), a Viet Nam war vet. We talked about my brother and I taught him the English words for "military, Army, Marines, Navy, Air Force." I also apologized for Viet Nam. "Our President...he was very stupid." The man pulled the car over and made me sit in the front seat next to him to chat with him.

When I got out of the car, he gave me back my money. "You don't pay! Your brother is a a Marine! A war vet! And you speak Korean very well!"

Feeling Respected

I have a horrible cold and called in sick to work today. I didn't want to because I just started the job, but the response I got was great. My coteacher and my vice-principal both texted me "feel better, get healthy, rest!" messages. Later, my coteacher (the cool one, I have two coteachers) called to see how I was and offered to bring me dinner if I didn't have any food.

Nobody made me go to the hospital for a simple cold, nobody came to my house to check on me, nobody demanded I come into work, nobody grilled me. In fact, my coteacher told me that if I feel better, I should take the train somewhere ("and really relax, Amanda!").

I didn't know coworkers could be sane in Korea...

Shoes

I bought a new pair of Converse All Stars today. They're purple. Sweet!

While I was purchasing them, the man that worked at the store (two women were helping me) looked at me and said, "Hi."

I thought maybe he spoke English. "Hi."

He switched to Korean and asked if I was a student. I realized I was wearing my Yongin University taekwondo t-shirt. I explained that I was a teacher but that I did taekwondo. We chatted briefly about Korean, shoes, where I bought the Converse I was wearing, and my socks.

Life is weird here, sometimes.

Acupuncture

I like my acupuncturist. I went to his office for the first time Wednesday. When I met him he said, "Oh! I am surprised?"

"Because I'm American?"

"Yes."

Master told me to give him a call so he could explain what was going on, but I didn't need to. We did fine without him, which was interesting because the doctor spoke so quickly. Often times he'd speak, I'd make an educated guess using what I understood, and then rephrase what he'd said. That worked. Today he was mumbling 면...면...면...over and over again. I just learned that form last week, so it felt like a victory since I haven't been studying much lately.

He asked me if I'd had acupuncture before. I told him I'd had hand acupuncture and buhang (bloodletting) done one. He said, "Oh! Most foreigners don't try bloodletting!"

I said, "It hurt! Will this hurt?"

"Ah...well..."

"A little? Maybe?"

"Yes, but not like bloodletting."

For the treatment, I was laid out on a table. My right shoulder was the one hurting and various needles (bigger than the ones I saw when I had hand acupuncture, but still fairly thin) were stuck into various points on my body. My left leg, some points on both feet, my left hand and arm and one needle in my right hand.

The doctor was wearing a style of traditional clothing, quiet music was playing. He held some of the needles in his mouth, though not the part that goes directly into the skin. I thought, "Mom would be a bit freaked out by this..." In fact, yesterday I told the doctor and nurse "my parents are nurses, but they don't do this."

Then, a reddish-orange light was turned on over my legs and I got to sleep for 30 minutes. Wha-hoo! A medically approved nap! When he came back, he removed the needles in a different order than he's set them, sometimes twisting or jiggling the needles a little bit as he did. That felt like a stinging sensation, but nothing ever bled. He then had me sit up and moved my arm through some rotations.

I went back yesterday and today, each time the arrangement of needles being slightly different. Tonight one was shoved through my t-shirt into my left shoulder. Tonight the doctor told me that if I still feel pain, I should come back tomorrow. But I feel really good.

So, did it work, what did it feel like, were there any side effects? It didn't hurt much, it felt like a slight pinching. My shoulder does feel much better, and it felt much better after the first treatment. After the first treatment the 덜그덕 덜그덕 sound was gone. Interestingly, various parts of my body were twitching and throbbing during and shortly after the treatments. I ended up with one small bruise on my left foot from yesterday's treatment.

The total cost for three treatments (and six doses of cold medicine) was 12,500 won. That's less than $15 for three doctor's appointment and medicine. Assa!

I know the theory behind acupuncture, moving blocked 기 and all that. I know the Western skepticism or the Western theories behind why it works (flushing the body with pain to make it seem like there's less pain). I know the placebo theory. I personally think that the argument could be made that massage is moving 기 around.

What's interesting to me is not so much the theories behind it but the fact that I'm so open to Chinese medicine here. In my experience, most people in the West who are into "alternative medicine" romanticize the heck out of the East, usually never having lived here. I find that obnoxious and patronizing. Here, there's nothing romantic about it, it's just accepted as medicine. And so for some reason, I accept it.

In short, I would do it again.

Traditional Chinese Cold Medicine

When the doctor found out I was sick, he gave me some medicine to eat with each meal. It was not delicious and I told him so today, much to his amusement. I don't know what it is, I don't know if it works, I just know that it tastes bad and I choke it down as quickly as possible.

The Materials

The Powder

The Drink

Doctors

Western Amanda

"Amanda, would you consider something like acupuncture?"

"Only as a last resort."

Eastern Amanda

"Master, my shoulder hurts. Should I go to a traditional doctor? There's one near my house." (How do I know this? I saw his sign and thought, If I ever need 부항 again, I can go there.)

"Yes, three days."

"OK."

Colds

Western Amanda

At Walgreens, "I have a cold, I want some OJ, some cough drops, Vicks, and sleep."

Eastern Amanda

At the acupuncturist, "I have a cold."

I am handed a packet of I-don't-know-what brown-colored, weird-smelling powder. "How do I take this?" I ask in Korean.

"With water. Take this with each meal."

And I do.

Meeting People

Western Amanda

"So, where are you from?"

Eastern Amanda

"How old are you?"

Well, looks like I'll be going somewhere this weekend or next. Just planning a trip and reading MOON HANDBOOK again is cheering me up a bit.

The 5,000 won-will-probably-fall-apart-in-two-months black "leather" bag is also cheering me up a bit.

I somehow managed to sleep on my arm/shoulder in the most convoluted way possible last night. I thought that getting my right shoulder moving might help—often slight pain is helped by movement. But Master walked in after NewSabumnim had us doing poomse for ten minutes, looked at the grimace on my face, and asked in Korean, "Are you tired?"

"No, my shoulder aches."

"Why?"

"I slept like this last night..." I demonstrated.

He made me sit down, then started playing with my shoulder. He moved me to a chair rather than the bench and moved both arms through a range of movement. Something in my right shoulder was popping, sliding, and making noise.

"덜그덕, 덜그덕," he said.

I knew what he was saying but wanted him to say it again. "What?"

He laughed, "The sound your shoulder is making. Deolgeudeok, deol-geu-deok."

He grabbed his handphone and used its dictionary to explained that my bone, muscles, ligaments, and blood vessels are "crossed" just "a little bit." He made fists held parallel to the floor and put his knuckles against each other. He then slid his knuckles slightly into the opposing fist's grooves. "You're like this."

It was decided—jointly—that I'll check out the traditional Chinese medical doctor that's a two minute walk from my house tomorrow afternoon. I'm going to get acupuncture done.

("Amanda, tomorrow, work ends. And then you—"

I used a new grammar form, "Tomorrow after work ends I'll go to the doctor."

"Ahh! Yes, good job! -(으)ㄹ후에!")

On another note, a photo from Saturday, taken on Master's camera.

Master's Daughter Models Amanda's (Prescription) Sunglasses

Lately things that wouldn't normally bother me are making me crazy. If one more person gets in my way, I swear, I will break something. Unfortunately, everyone is getting in my way! The normal "I'm having a Bad Korea Day" fixes are not working.

I texted Master. "I will be late. I'm sorry. When you have time, can I get some advice?" Four minutes later he called to ask if I was OK and what was going on. I said, "I have a cold, but I'm OK. I'll see you."

"Amanda, what's wrong?"

"Master, I need a dictionary. It's too hard."

"OK, I understand. See you."

I got to class a full 30 minutes late and went through class. After class Master sat down with me and we spoke in our blend of languages. I said, "I'm tired. And I am getting a cold."

"You homesick?"

"No. Burn out, you know burn out?" I asked. He said maybe and I looked it up in my dictionary. "I am this," I said, holding the dictionary out for him to look at.

"Ahhh," Master said, "Me too."

"I thought so," I said smiling. "You are tired?"

"Yes, too busy. Why are you this? New job?"

I looked up several words. "No, I like the job. Expat life. Taekwondo. Seoul. Too many people. On the subway..."

"Old Miss Diary?" He laughed when I nodded.

"Usually, when I am tired, I will do something in Seoul. But when my parents were here, I saw so much of Seoul. In America, when I am burned out, I go driving, a road trip. But here I don't have a car. So, I want to go on a weekend trip. I will take a train or fly. Where should I go?"

"What do you want? Mountain? Sea?"

"Mountain, sea, forest, OK! Not Seoul!"

Even though he was tired, Master sat with me for a half an hour, brainstorming places to go, finding out the rough cost, telling me the length of time to various places, and finally ranking his list in order of what I should see first.

And this is why I love that man.

This was exactly what I needed.

I will be booking a ticket soon.

I need to get the hell out of this city for a few days.

Yesterday's most common thought: Get the hell out of my way before I rip off your leg and beat you with it Old Miss Diary style.

(The clip is from 6:32 to 7:42.)

Taxes and Drinking

Thursday night I missed class because I was doing my taxes. (What? Huh? Why haven't I done them? Because expats are given an automatic two month extension.) I texted Master to tell him I was doing my taxes so I couldn't come to class. He asked what "doing taxes" was and I said "state sponsored torture." That took some explaining...

Friday night I missed class as well. The other foreign teachers in the area have a standing Friday dinner date and I decided to join them. We had some delicious Korean food and then went to a bar. I texted Master, "I'm having dinner with some foreign teachers. I can't come tonight. See you tomorrow."

I should mention that the drinking started at 3:30 at a staff meeting. One of my seniors poured me beer. Knowing full well that I was going back to teach some students in ten minutes.

Saturday my studio was going to go watch NewSabumnim's demonstration. Michael was going to come with but then couldn't. I called Master to tell him and to let him know that I'd be taking the bus with him. He asked what I was doing, and asked if we were drinking soju. I said no, and he told me to teach the other foreigners how to drink soju. I laughed and said we were at an Irish pub.

When I got off the phone, the other foreigners (here 3 months, over a year, and over four years) asked where I learned to speak Korean. I wasn't really speaking that much Korean.

Somehow our group of four grew into a group of eight. With eight people, there are multiple conversations and they're loud. I thought, "Oh God, I've become the person I hate." I was exhausted but didn't want to be the first to break up the group, even though I was with foreigners. (Koreans don't break up a group. When one leaves, they all leave.) Finally someone else ducked out around eleven and I did, too.

I took a taxi home and as I was walking up my steps, I got a phone call from the guy I was supposed to have a Sort-Of-Date with last week but who had to cancel at the last minute. He was out with a friend, two blocks from my apartment. Did I want to join them for drinks?

I texted Master at midnight, telling him I probably wouldn't be able to come to the demo. Moments later I got a phone call from him. He told me that I wasn't allowed to not come and made me promise I would come. I groaned and he said, "You've missed two classes, you're coming tomorrow." He also said he was out drinking with his friends and he'd be there, so I had no excuse.

OK, I wasn't really drinking that much, so no big deal, right? But then I only got a few hours of sleep.

NewSabumnim's Demo

Photos are up in the Gallery tab.

NewSabumnim is on the Kukkiwon demonstration team. Twice a week they do a demonstration at one of the local palaces. I saw their demo with my parents and it was really good. This time many people from our studio went together. Master chartered a bus and we all went to the event together.

I sat with Master's Daughter on the bus. I told her I had lip gloss and she got immensely excited. Unfortunately, she dropped the pot on the bus and I couldn't find it. Guess I'll have to pick up a new pot of gloss.

At one point she wanted to sit near her parents. I brought her up to the front where her parents were, then turned around to go sit back down. She started bawling and Master said, "Amanda, she wants to sit with her." I sat down next to her mom and she crawled onto my lap. Her mother said, "She loves you."

The demonstration is aimed at foreigners, though there were still more Koreans there. One of the little kids saw the other foreigners and asked if I knew who they were. I laughed and said, "I don't know them."

"Really?"

One of the Master's friends was there with his studio, but we only spoke to each other for a few moments.

The demo itself was very good, as you would expect since it's the Kukkiwon's team. During the demo there is a time when audience members are allowed to come break a board. When my parents were here I did a jumping front kick with NewSabumnim holding the board for me.

This time when they called for volunteers I was some distance away, watching Master's Daughter run around the palace grounds with her newfound Older Brother friend yelling "Older brother, come here! Hurry up!"

Master had asked why I'd worn a dress, as I wouldn't be able to do a kicking break. I replied that I didn't know I was expected to do a break since I'd already done one at the demo a few weeks before. So I started back when I heard their announcement. They were having problems getting females to volunteer and all of my studiomates started screaming "A-MAN-DA! A-MAN-DA!"

Just as I got there, NewSabumnim was dragging a very overweight foreign man to the mats. He said, "Let me get this straight. I'm going to break a board with my bare hands?"

I was the last person to break. I wish I had worn pants because everyone ended up doing hand strikes. As I was breaking my studiomates were screaming. I'm shocked half of them didn't run onto the mats, they were so excited.

When I returned to the kids, they were pawing at me, screaming, "Oh, Amanda, good job! Good job!" A bunch of Koreans I didn't know asked to take their photo with me. Well, I am a movie star and all that.

I asked Master why he made me come to the demonstration. He grinned and shrugged, "I don't know. But you promised! Thank you!"

Michael's Party

My friend Michael may or may not be leaving Korea (it changes constantly, and not due to anything Michael is doing). He had a small party Saturday night and YJ and I went together.

At one point YJ turned to me and said, "I don't feel like I'm in Korea. I feel like I'm in New York, maybe."

I burst out laughing.

Today we had a taekwondo tournament. This was the first time I competed in a taekwondo tourney. It was fine but it was a very, very long day. I did poomse and striking; I got "third place" in each, which is not nearly as special as it seems.

When we got the program books, I think most of the kids looked for my name after their own, because they all found it before I did! "Oh! Amanda! Amanda!" I have been wondering if "아" is a last name here. It would have to be a very, very uncommon one if it were. I asked Master and he said no, so it was obvious that my name was unusual.

"I Think You Are Korean."

The opening ceremony was so boring. Blue, Tired Guy, and a few of the other teenage boys hadn't changed, so they didn't have to partake in the ceremony. Next time, I'm taking a page from their book. I took the time to estimate that at least 300 people were sitting on the floor in doboks, waiting to compete. That wasn't counting the people who came late or weren't on the floor.

When the ceremony was over, Master said, "Amanda, I look. You're the only foreigner here."

"I know. I think there are 300 people here."

Master pointed to the other studios that hadn't been on the floor. "Those studios, parents, taekwondo coaches, I think 600 or 700. You only foreigner."

I said dramatically, "Oh! I am lonely!" in Korean.

Master replied in English, "No, Amanda, I think you are Korean. You are not American now. You are Korean."

With unintentional perfect timing, a very young girl walked by, staring wide-eyed at me the whole time.

"관장님! 한국 사람이 아니에요!" Master! I am not Korean! I nodded at the girl, still staring at me from 25 feet away.

He laughed and said, "She not know, you are Korean."

이만다

Poomse was first. Eight of us were competing in the adult class, including two women from Master Brother's studio. One of them, Goalie and Goalie's Brother's Mother, I've had beer with before.

The woman I freesparred at my black belt test was there, too. She recognized me and we chatted a bit. (You can see her in the photo below; she's the very short one.) She's 17. When I told her my age, she freaked out. She said, "My Sabumnim is a year younger than you!" I said, "And my Sabumnim is two years younger than me." She asked me if I'd be at the second dan test next year and I said I hoped so. She said, "Ah! I will see you again, then!"

Yes, slowly taking over Korea with taekwondo, I am...

The Adults After Poomse

We did 고려 and one random form, which ended up being Yuk Jang. I messed up at least once on 고려. I had a knife hand when I should have had a fist. I did OK on the forms, but I felt somewhat "off." My pacing was uneven and I wasn't snapping correctly. Master said I did fine, but I know he knows I was nervous because it was my first tourney, and he was forgiving my performance.

Two winners of the eight of us were chosen, and the rest of us received third place certificates and bronze medals. While we were on stage, the announcer called our names. I never heard my name, so I just stood there. After a while, when nobody had stepped up, Goalie's Mother said, "Amanda!"

I thought, "My, how did I not hear my own name? Why did I think he was calling a Lee?"

When we got off stage, Master immediately checked my certificate for the spelling. I didn't realize what he was doing and said, "I'm sorry! I didn't hear my name! I'm sorry!" By this time, we were back with the boys, and one of them teased me, "안녕 이만다!"

Turns out I'm not an idiot. The announcer misread 아만다 as 이만다. I didn't know who "Lee Man Da" was, so I hadn't moved.

Since 이 is a last name and 아 isn't, it's not that surprising that he misread it. But come on, the white lady is standing right in front of you!

Solo Woman

The last tournament event was striking. It was really disorganized. We were called down to wait while the machines were being brought out. They were tested and then someone realized that the poomse competition wasn't over. Or something. I'm honestly not sure. We were sent back to our seats to wait some more.

When we finally did end up doing striking, I was supposed to be in a class of six people. However, only four were there and I was the only female. Normally the classes would be split out by gender, but since I was the only female, I was lumped with the men. I have no idea was my striking score was, but I wasn't first or second place. After we finished striking, another guy asked us if we'd already gone and sent us one place. Then we got sent another place. Then...it happened again.

When it was time for us to receive our certificates and medals, two of the guys (including the second place guy) were missing. At least time my name was read correctly. When I returned to Master, he thought I was second place. I corrected him and used his handphone to look up "disorganized." He agreed.

He did say that my form looked good, I need to work a little more on timing. He also said that next time he thinks I should only do poomse since there are no other women in my class doing striking.

As I was exiting the stage, Seventeen Year Old Sparring Woman yelled, "Congratulations, Amanda!" really loudly. It was a bit embarrassing.

Ghost

Ghost competed in sparring and was awesome. He got to second place in his class. I know he was disappointed that he didn't win, but he really did a great job. I was really proud of him. We all were.

Ghost (Red) Sparring

Give the Kids a Camera...

The tournament was an awful lot of Sit and Wait. I studied Korean a bit, slept a bit, and tried to ignore the kids who weren't from my studio who wanted to speak English with me.

(While I was waiting to do the striking competition, a girl yelled "foreigner," over and over.

I ignored her.

"Tongil foreigner!" she said, having read my dobok.

I turned around and said in English, "What?"

She froze.

"What do you want?"

She stayed frozen.

I switched to Korean. "Please don't yell at me. It hurts my ears and I am busy."

She nodded, wide-eyed.)

Master's 선배 that I met in February showed up. He greeted me and I greeted him in turn. He asked if I remembered who he was. I laughed and he asked where we met. I answered by demonstrating the clapping pattern we used when we cheered. He said, "Oh, your Korean is very good!"

Master said, "She is very Korean. She even drinks soju now. And when she drinks soju, she speaks a lot of Korean."

Master must have had soju at lunch, because he was certainly confusing the facts. His English improves with soju, my Korean turns to mush!

I let the kids loose with my camera and got back some amusing photos.

New Kid Playing With His Handphone

Tired Guy and His Signature Smile
(And the Signature Converse All Stars of High School and College Students)

Coverboy was awesome today for some reason. He was just really funny, was willing to scream loudly for Ghost with me, was chattering away in Korean and helping me with my homework.

Coverboy Plays

I have a ton of photos of him. Drinking soda, playing with other studiomates, acting coy. There's a reason I call him Coverboy (though I used to call him Mischievous)!

Coverboy and Amanda

Near the end of the tourney, I was very tired and very hot. The temperature in the gym was at least 5 degrees warmer than in the hallways. I found a spot without anyone around me and studied Korean. Master left and a few moments later Crybaby and Brave's Brother were freaking out, sending me outside (Master drove me to the tourney).

I got to his car and he said he was only outside because it was so warm inside.

I sighed and said, "I have twenty Korean mothers! 'Amanda, go there. Amanda, come here. Amanda, do this!' I have twenty Korean mothers, and they're all my little brothers!"

Master laughed. He looked up a word meaning "intimate, familiar." He explained when I was first at the studio, everyone only spoke to me a little bit, but now that we're familiar with each other, they treat me like they do each other.

Considering my age and gender, he's right, of course.

All in all, an awesome (Korean) Memorial Day.

Scholar
Saturday night I met Scholar for the Seoul International Book Fair, a nice dinner, and some good conversation.

I learned some new words, a few phrases, and some Chinese roots.

Master

Tonight, after class, Master asked what I'd done this weekend. A few moments later he said something he's said to me at least 6 dozen times in different contexts.

"Amanda...wait."

It meant something else entirely this time.

Maybe I need to Post-It my apartment with that word.

Wait.

My sixth grade students have no idea what to make of me.

I am always supposed to have a coteacher in the room, but the sixth grade coteacher is on a business trip. Fine with me. In two days worth of classes, I've started to make them understand what I want. And since my teaching was sort of wacky by American standards, you know it's wacky by Korean standards.

(I see third and fourth graders once a week, fifth and sixth graders twice a week. I have four classes each of 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade and five classes of 6th graders. I have approximately 35 people per class and I don't know any of their names. Neither do my coteachers. I didn't meet the 3rd graders this week because of court.)

The students, much like my American students, think I'm crazy.

I make them stand up not to answer questions (which they already do) but to pit the standing half of the class against the sitting half of the class in talking activities.

When they look bored, instead of screaming at them, I make them stand up and get moving.

Today I made the kids who arrived late stand in the front of the room and start talking first.

I wore Spiderman socks just for the confused sixth grader.

During our chanting exercise today, I was dancing around the room, bobbing my head, and making them move their heads in time, too. Four girls in the last class couldn't stop giggling at me. But they were singing the song.

In each class I had a contest about the chanting between the boys and the girls. The boys won 4 classes out of 5 and got to leave the classroom first.

I take away their Rubik's cubes (exceedingly popular right now) and then play with them while teaching. "How much is this?" "A million dollars." "It's too expensive!"

I tell them to keep their books closed when they've been trained to open them immediately (they get too distracted with them open!).

I make the whole class hold their arms above their heads so that they don't start writing while I'm talking.

I walked with one kid back to his main teacher and asked her in Korean if he talks so much in her class. He said, "Oh! Amanda! You speak Korean!" I said in Korean, "No, I don't speak Korean."

I make them say at least one sentence before leaving the room (today it was "tell me what you're doing this weekend" or look at these two dice and tell me if you'd buy the item for that price or if it's "too expensive!"). One group of boys was slick and after one said, "I'm playing soccer" the other 16 yelled out at once "I'm playing soccer!" I let them go with that and a yell down the hallways, "Good one, boys!"

I make them use cute voices when repeating the DVD. Deep voices for the men, high voices for the women, voices with some sort of beat for the musical parts.

I answer their messages on my Cyworld page.

To me the, though, the oddest thing is that when I dip down to touch them like I did my American students—to shoulder hug them or to touch their backs instead of saying "I see what you're doing and you need to stop" or to whisper in their ear—or when I hold my hand up for a high five, they flinch.

Some of my students in America flinched, but every last one of them flinches here.

Hitting students in the classroom is allowed here. I refuse to do it, but yesterday when one kid was choking another to the point that he looked like he was going to faint, I wasn't afraid to put some muscle into breaking them up.

I have to say, it is much easier to control a class of 35 kids for one 40 minute period than a class of 22 kids all day like I had to in my American classes. It's easier to keep the enthusiasm level up, too, with each new batch of kids, which is good since I'm teaching only five different lessons a week during the regular day. (In other words, today I taught the same lesson five times in a row.)

And dang, I am digging these sixth graders.