Amanda Takes Off...

"I want to see a picture of your family," I say to Good Man over Lotteria food.

"I have one. It's in my purse."

I shake my head.

"My wallet."

I shake my head.

He thinks. "My bag?"

"Yep."

He can be forgiven. They call men's underwear "panties" in Korean.

Lest you think I'm picking on Good Man, he had to correct me when I said I had presents that I'd brought from Vietnam the Person. Who is Vietnam the Person? I don't know, but that's what I was saying. "I have gifts from Vietnam the Person!" He corrected it to the point that the only original words of mine were "gift" and "Vietnam."

I was late to taekwondo and gave Master's Wife the gifts then headed up to the studio. Before I could finish closing the door, Master's Daughter was running behind the desk, "Open Amanda's presents! What did she bring?"

Class was good. At one point we were on the floor on our backs, head to head with another student. We were supposed to raise our arms above our heads, flat on the floor and grab their elbows, linking our arms together for support.

Master said to one of the kids "Elbow! Elbow! You don't know Korean?"

I caught it without having to think about what he had said and burst out laughing because I did, indeed understand him. He grinned and switched to English. "Elbow? Elbow?"

When I went downstairs after class to talk to Master, his daughter was prancing about the house in her underwear and the conical hat I got for her (also got one for her brother, and brought back some food and tea for the parents).

"Master, tomorrow I won't come to class. There's a moon...moon, sun, moon, Earth thing tomorrow. You know?" His confused look told me no, so I got out my dictionary, "Lunar eclipse tomorrow. And Good Man and I are watching it together."

Master made "oooooh, woooooh" romantic sounds at me, which just caused me to blush terribly.

Despite people sometimes thinking there must be some sort of romantic undertones to our relationship, there never have been any and I've never heard him make romantic sounds, not even when he teases the boys. It surprised the heck out of me.

"I will never become an ajumma if you never become an ajosshi."

Good Man looks at me, "What do you mean?" Though ajumma and ajosshi lit. mean "aunt" and "uncle," they are terms of respect used to describe middle-aged women and men. And the middle-aged women are often called The Third Sex by Korean teens because if their...look.

"If you don't get pants that belt exactly at your waistline and do a comb over to hide a balding head, I will not perm my hair and wear visors." He laughs at me and I go on. "But if you start acting like an ajosshi and do that spitting thing—kkkkcccrrrrrakkkkk SPIT!—I will start acting like an ajumma."

He laughs and I yell, "사과 5개 2천원!" Five apples, two thousand won! He breaks into giggles and I wave my hands around like the ajummas do at the subway stations. "I will sit at the subway station. 사과 5개 2천원! 사과 5개 2천원!"

He just keeps laughing. Every time he tries to get a word in, I start yelling about apples.

"사과 5개 2천원!"