Amanda Takes Off...

The Seoul subway changed while I was gone.

There are no ticket selling men anymore. Instead, you buy your plastic ticket from a machine for an extra 500 won and return it at the end of the trip to get the 500 won deposit back. If you want a T-Card, you buy it from a machine. If you want to reload your plastic ticket or T-Card (I'm really not sure what the difference is now that the ticket itself is reloadable), you use a machine.

This made me sad for some reason. One of the first struggles I remember having in Korean was trying to buy a T-card and not realizing that the card itself had a charge and a minimum first time charge. When I finally figured that out, I was so proud of myself. Alas, I suppose new expats will have that experience with a machine. (Or not. I think they're multi-lingual.)

Man Stepping Off the Subway

Some stops are now announced in Chinese as well as Korean and English. The first time I heard it, I whipped my head around and stared at Good Man. "Did you hear that?"

The fonts for the signs are changing. Dongdaemun Stadium station's name is changing.

Everyone is supposed to walk on the right side now. Unh huh. If they want that to happen, they need to convert all of the escalators and moving walkways to follow that convention.

Many of the stations now have anti-suicide glass panes up. Apparently these make the stations quieter (and warmer, it seemed to me), but I prefer the old stations because you can peer down the tracks.

Crossed and Uncrossed Legs
Anti-suicide doors can be seen in this photo.

Of course, some things never change. The touts with their wares, the ajummas elbowing their way to their seats, the beggars and homeless men.

Men Examining Dokdo Propaganda in a Subway Station
"Walk on the Right" sign can be seen in this photo.

But more interesting than the changes were the memories. "This is where I bought my first T-Card," I said to Good Man. That was the first memory, but they kept coming.

"I used to buy my socks here."

"I remember when they were doing construction here."

"This is where that chick kept smacking her boyfriend because he was checking me out." That was after we'd seen Jump!

"I used to walk this way every night after taekwondo."

"This is where we had to catch a taxi to the National Museum because it was pouring rain."

I was expecting things to change. I was expecting some things to remain the same. I wasn't expecting the flood of memories from subway stations!

Waiting

Master's Daughter

Thursday, Good Man and I met with Master's family again. We had dinner and we had plans to see Sherlock.

Master's Daughter

The kids came with us to the movie and Master's Daughter sat next to me. At some point she wouldn't stop whispering, even when her mother told her to. I dragged her onto my lap and whispered in her ear. "We can't talk..."

She nodded. "OK, Amanda, but [??? request]."

I didn't know what she'd requested, but I sort of recognized it as something Good Man sometimes says. I started patting and scratching her back. Master's Daughter lifted us the back of her shirt and I scratched her back. Every once in a while she'd whisper "위에" or "밑에." Higher, lower.

Turns out that the thing I didn't understand was "scratch."

Master's Son

Before we went to the movies, Master said, "Amanda, you know 윷놀이? 화투?" I said that I knew both yut nori and hwa tu (go stop) but that I wasn't good at either.

He asked which one I wanted to play. We decided on yut nori. "Next time, Amanda, we play hwa tu."

"Next time, Master? When will that be?"

He paused and thought for a moment, "I don't know, but we will meet again!"

I grinned. It is true.

Playing Yut Nori (Photo Taken by Daughter)

Master and his wife were one team, and Good Man and I were another. The first game, Master's team won. Drats! We had a popcorn bet going on the game.

Master, Winning

The second game, Good Man scored four yut noris in a row. Go, Good Man!

Master, Losing

We had a third game to break the tie and! We lost.

Next time! Next time, we will win!

Good Man's Mother decided we needed new coats.

"Mother, thank you, but I don't need a new coat." I love my coat.

"I want to buy you a coat."

I smiled, "OK, but I don't even want a new coat."

"I don't like your coat," she said, "It looks North Korean." My coat is a Swedish military coat from WWII. It's not North Korean. Before I could protest, she said, "It's a wedding gift."

I didn't mention the wonderful rice cooker she bought us as a wedding gift. I tried arguing a big more, but I finally said, "I have no choice?"

She smiled, "Right!" Mother promised she'd buy us coats as a discount. Ahh, one ajumma to another. (Note: apparently since I'm not a mother yet, I'm not technically an ajumma.)

Me

We purchased my coat first. Mother said I could get what I wanted, but when I said I wanted a red coat she flipped out and said it was too bold and she'd get me a red scarf instead. The woman at the department store offered me a pink one, instead. Oh hell no. We I Mother ended up choosing this coat with a red scarf. It does feel like a nice, grown-up coat, I've got to admit.

The women at the department store seemed rather amused that I was speaking solely in Korean with Mother.

Good Man

Good Man's coat was up next and I really wanted him in black, though he wanted navy. Luckily, Mother and I won! I love this coat. I think Good Man looks great in it. Against, I think the men at the store were shocked that I was rattling off so much Korean with Mother.

I guess it was a good thing we had no choice in buying the coats; we wore them to the funeral.

Part of the reason we came home from the funeral after two days instead of three is that I already had plans made with friends. Mother (mostly, I think) and Father didn't want us to miss all of our plans.

Luckily, Diana and Paul were understanding of multiple changing plans and the like. Diana and I originally met because she sent me an email about practicing taekwondo in Korea. We become blog buddies before meeting in person in Seoul. Her family likes where we do in the States, so it feels like we see her quite often. Diana is marrying today, but unfortunately, we came home yesterday.

I don't know how I started reading Paul's blog, but I'm glad I found it (or he found me?). He writes well-educated, detailed posts about Korean culture and history. He's the kind of expat Koreans want. This meeting was our first time meeting in person.

Along for the ride? Diana's siblings, fiancé husband, friend, and siblings.

We ended up going to Seoul's Armpit (Itaewon) in order to find a tongue room for Diana's Sister (who had swallowed her's). We didn't even end up looking for one. But we did get to partake in some Mexican food, served with nothing that looked like kimchi.

Namsan Tower with the 세해복 많이 받으세요 Woori Bank Tiger

Surprised Butterfly

Min Gi

Paul and Diana's Brother

Diana's Friend, Diana's Sister, Diana

Street Food in Seoul's Armpit

Seen at Itaewon Station

Paul and Me

So during the funeral there were times I was having a really difficult time dealing with everyone, everything. I was tired of small talk. I was tired of "when will you make babies?" I was tired of little kids staring at me (I had forgotten that, somehow?). I was tired of "oooh! She speaks Korean so well!"

I was bitching to Good Man at some point about it all.

Good Man shook his head and said, very simply, "Yes, it's hard being different for me, too."

I turned to face him, and I saw Good Man in a different light. I am always reflecting on how it is for me to adjust and adapt to his culture. I usually consider how Korean culture and my relationship with Good Man has changed me. I wasn't considering what it was like for Good Man to come back to Korea, married to a white woman. For all of the ways that I've had to adapt and change, he has, too. All I thought was that it must be easy for him to be back home. But he had to be a buffer for me. And he was being placed in the middle of things, intentionally and unintentionally.

I took his hand. "I'm sorry I've been so selfish," I said. "I didn't even think of that."

He rested his head on my shoulder. "It's OK."