Realizations

I got to talk to Jennifer on the phone/Skype last night.

First off, how nice it was to get to talk to her.

Second, while we were chatting, I realized that I need to quit saying—and quit thinking—”if it weren’t for Good Man, I’d be in Korea for at least one more year.”

Fact is, when I’ve been pissed at something here in America, or when I’ve been homesick for Korea, I’ve said it. To him or to myself or to a third party.

And that’s patently unfair to both of us. I’m not some mindless Stepford Girlfriend. I made the decision to come here willfully. He didn’t strong arm or guilt me into coming here.

Good Man chose to stay in Korea for a year for me. I never wrote about this because, frankly, I thought he was out of his mind at the time. But he never, ever held it over my head, and he never made me feel like I owed him anything for it. And for me to say, or even think, that the responsibility of being here rests solely on him is pretty low. We made this decision. Together.

For all the times I miss Korea, I’d rather be here with him than in Korea without him.