Dear Student Loan Company,
I know you wanted me to take 240 months to pay you back. I know you wanted to make approximately 80% of the original value of the loan in interest. I know I robbed you of that opportunity by paying off my student loan in 50 months, saving myself thousands of dollars in interest.
I know that banks and loan companies are having a hard time right now, so I’m sorry that I took all that interest away from you.
Oh, it’s April 1st, Student Loan Company! You caught me! I am joshin’ ya—I’m not sorry at all!