Wedding Day: What Went Right and What Went Wrong

Saturday went really well over all. A few (mostly) minor things went wrong. And some stuff went really right. (Note that most of the wrong things weren’t really a big deal.)

Wrong
* Good Man’s weird cousin went rifling through Mark’s Lover’s nightstand. Nobody told us about it until later. Ugh. Kid is 14 but acts like he’s 8. When they invited themselves, Good Man told me the cousin was older—like 18. I don’t like this kid.
* Maid wasn’t really ready with the food when we were ready to eat, but Mark helped solve that with a champagne toast. Not a huge deal.
* Maid used about twice as much coffee grounds as she needed and the coffee was really, really thick (see Rights).
* Forgot to tell people to sign the wedding certificate left-to-right instead of top-to-bottom, so we have a huge gutter on the right. (Mom suggested we get a double happiness stamp to fill in the empty space. An easy fix.)

* We had way too much food and a little too much liquor. Not a huge deal, but we had to toss a ton of rice cakes.
* I wanted to wait longer to start our vows, but people seemed a little uncomfortable with the silence, so we started earlier. Also, although we asked for a period of silence after each person spoke, that didn’t work out. People really wanted to speak. Ha!
* Johnny and Sister misunderstood the poem reading directions and self-adjusted, but Johnny felt bad about it. Again, no big deal. Like I said to him, “If we wanted it to be perfect, we would’ve made you practice beforehand.”
* Good Man and I should’ve practiced bouncing stuff off of my skirt. Eighteen kids? You’ve gotta be kidding.
* We didn’t get formals of me alone done. Good Man got solo formals, but I didn’t. I’m a little torn on how to feel about this. On the one hand I care only because Good Man got solo formals. If he hadn’t, I wouldn’t’ve thought of it. It’s not like we’re going to put solo photos of us up around the house. And I’ll be wearing the hanbok again, so I can always get photos later. [ETA: I was wrong! We did!]

Right
* Small wedding of 21 people total. It was nice to get to talk to everyone.

* Grandma loved the Maid’s “Turkish coffee” (see Wrongs).
* No seating chart. People mixed themselves up in a way I wouldn’t’ve and seemed to enjoy themselves.
* No decor. I didn’t bother with decor other than the framed photos and paper flowers and many people commented on how great the house and yard looked. Yes, thank you, Mark’s Lover.
* Keeping it short. Most people went home before 4:30.
* Doing the pyebaek in front of everyone. Since most people had never seen this before, they seemed to find it interesting.
* Sly, the dog. Mark’s Lover’s big dogs were in the basement, but his tiny dog, Sly, was roaming around. He was rolling around in the grass, putting his paws on people’s knees… He kept on eye on the pyebaek—he was just fun to have around.
* Staying at the hotel with everyone else. It was nice to get to catch up with people, and we were much closer to the site.
* No dancing, no garter tossing, no cake cutting, etc. Nobody asked about it, and nobody waited around for us to cut cake or anything.

* The Quaker ceremony. It was wonderful to hear what people said and several people later told me they really liked the ceremony.
* Getting my hair done by Good Man’s family rather than paying someone else to do it. It was more fun and I wasn’t stuck with some sort of wedding updo.
* Using my own makeup so I felt normal.
* Being mostly bilingual.
* Wearing hanboks and not doing the two outfits, one change thing. So right for a variety of reasons. I didn’t have to worry about losing weight. I didn’t worry about my farmer’s tan. Everyone loved seeing the hanboks.